Captain Samuel Brunt - A Voyage to Cacklogallinia

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I was struck dumb with Amazement, and while I was considering with my
self what this should mean, I observ'd a Man riding up to us, mounted on
a Lion; when he came to the others, I found him of the common Size with
the Inhabitants of our Globe; he had on his Head a Crown of Bays, which
in an Instant chang'd to a Fool's Cap, and his Lion to an Ass. He drew
from his Breast a Rowl like a Quire of Written Paper, which using as a
Sword, he set upon the others, and dispers'd them. Some ran over the
Sea, as on dry Ground; others flew into the Air, and some sunk into the
Earth. Then alighting from his Ass, he opened the Jaws of the Animal,
went down his Throat, and they both vanish'd.

After I had recover'd my Fright, I told _Volatilio_, that I fear'd this
Planet was inhabited by evil Spirits. He answered, that what we had
seen, was sufficient to induce us to believe so. We look'd for the
House, which we saw rise into the Air, and vanish in Flame and Smoke,
which strengthen'd our Opinion. However, we resolv'd to go forward, when
one of the _Palanquineers_ said he saw a House on the left, and People
of my Size and Species making towards us.

We determin'd therefore to wait their Arrival, which was in less than a
Quarter of an Hour. They accosted me very courteously, as I could gather
from their Gestures, tho' they seem'd surprized at the Size of the
_Cacklogallinians_. I was not less amaz'd at the Beauty of their
Persons, and the Becomingness of their Dress, either of which I can give
no just Idea of. Let it suffice, that I seem'd both in my own, and in
the Eyes of the _Cacklogallinians_, something of the same Species, but
frightfully ugly.

These People are neither a corporeal, nor an aerial Substance, but (I
know not how otherwise to express my self) between both. They spoke to
me in a Language I did not understand, but the Tone of their Voices, and
the Smoothness of their Syllables, were divinely harmonious. I bow'd my
Body to the Ground three times, and offer'd my Credentials, which one of
them took, but by the shaking of his Head, I found understood nothing of
the Contents. _Volatilio_ then address'd himself to them, which made
them look on one another, as People who hardly believed their Senses.
As I had address'd these _Selenites_ in the _Cacklogallinian_ Language,
I had a Mind to try, if speaking in those of the _Europeans_ (for I
understood, beside my own, the _French_ and _Spanish_) I should have any
better Success. I therefore spoke in _English_, and, to my great Joy,
one of the Company answer'd me. He ask'd me, Whether I came from the
World? if so, how I durst undertake so perilous a Journey? I told him,
I would satisfy his Curiosity in answering all his Questions, but
desired he would give me some Time; for I had been so terrified by
Phantoms, since my Arrival, that I was hardly capable of Recollection.

While I was speaking, a Man on Horseback ran full speed upon me with a
drawn Sabre, to cleave me down; but the _Selenite_ waving his Hand, he
soon vanish'd.

"You need, _said he_, apprehend nothing from these Shades; they are
the Souls of the Inhabitants of your World, which being loos'd from
the Body by Sleep, resort here, and for the short Space allotted
them, indulge the Passions which predominate, or undergo the
Misfortunes they fear while they are in your Globe. Look ye, _said
he_, yonder is a Wretch going to the Gallows, and his Soul feels the
same Agony, as if it was a real Sentence to be executed on him. Our
Charity obliges us, when we see those imaginary Ills, to drive the
Soul back to its Body, which we do, by waving our Hand in the Air,
and the agonizing Dreamer wakes. We do also retain them by a Virtue
peculiar to the _Selenites_, and as they sometimes administer a
great deal of Diversion, we do it for our Entertainment, which is
the Reason of those long Naps of two or three Days, nay, of as many
Weeks, which cause the Wonder of your World. The Souls of your
impure Dreamers never reach beyond the middle Region. But we delay
too long inviting you to our Habitations, where you shall have all
possible Care taken of you. But by what Art have you taught Fowls
articulate Sounds? and where could you possibly find them of that
Size?"

I told him they were rational Beings, but that the Story was now too
long to tell him; he presented me to the rest of the Company, and, at
my Request, the _Cacklogallinians_ were humanly treated, whom otherwise
they had look'd upon as overgrown dunghill Fowls. _Volatilio_ did not
appear much surpriz'd at this, who had once esteem'd me a Prodigy of
Nature. As we walk'd to the House, one of the _Selenites_ address'd me
in the _Spanish_ Language, with the known Affiability and Gravity of
that Nation.

"Sir, _said he_, I cannot consider you as other, than the bravest and
wisest of all Mortals, who could find the Way to reach our World,
and had the Courage to undertake the Journey; for it's certain, none
cloath'd in Flesh ever (before you) made so bold an Attempt, or at
least succeeded in it: Tho' I have read the Chimera's of _Dominick
Gonzales_. While you stay amongst us, you may depend upon our
treating you with all the Respect answerable to so great Merit, and
in every thing endeavour, as far as the Power we have will permit,
that the Design of your Journey may not be frustrated, which I am
apt to believe, is no other than to extend your Knowledge."

I return'd him many Thanks for his Humanity, but told him I durst not
attribute to my self the Character he gave me; that I was a Lover of
Truth, and would not, on any Account, disguise the real Motive which
sent me on an Undertaking I look'd upon impossible to go thro' with,
and which I very unwillingly embark'd in: But since, contrary to my
Expectations, Providence has guided me to this Terrestrial Paradice,
I should esteem my self extreamly happy, if I might be permitted to ask
such Questions as my Curiosity might prompt me to.

He answer'd, that nothing I desir'd to know should be kept from me. We
soon reach'd the House, which was regular, neat, and convenient. We all
sat down in an inner Hall, and he who spoke _English_, desired I would
give an Account, both of the Motives, the Manner, and Accidents of my
Journey, which I did as succinctly as possible, interpreting the
Credentials, when I gave them.

He was astonish'd at the Account I gave him of the _Cacklogallinians_,
and said, if my Account was not back'd with ocular Demonstration, he
should take their Story for the Ravings of a distemper'd Brain.

"I find, _said he_, you begin to be drowzy; I would therefore have
you and your rational Fowls (as you call them) repose your selves,
while I in the _Vernacular_ Language, repeat to my Companions the
Wonders I have heard from you."

We were indeed very sleepy, and I was heartily glad of the Proposal, as
were also the _Cacklogallinians_, when I mention'd it to them. They, as
well as my self, were provided each of them with a Bed, in very handsome
and commodious Rooms. These Beds were so very soft, that I seem'd to lye
on a Couch of Air. When we awak'd, the _Selenites_ came into my Chamber,
and told me it was time to take some Nourishment; that they had provided
Corn for my Companions, and desir'd I would sit down to Supper with
them, it being their usual time.

"Why, Sir, _said I_, to our _English_ Interpreter, do you sup by
Day-light? You mistake, _said he_, it is now Night; your World to
the Inhabitants of this Hemisphere (which is always turn'd to it,
this Planet moving in an Epicycle) reflects so strong the Sun's
Light, that your Error is excusable. What then, _said I_, do those
of the other Hemisphere for Light? They have it, _said he_, from the
Planets."

I went with them into a Parlour, where, after a Hymn was sung, we sat
down to a Table cover'd with Sallets and all sorts of Fruits.

"You must, _said the Selenite_, content your self with what we can
offer you, which is nothing but the spontaneous Products of the
Earth: We cannot invite you to other, since the eating any thing
that has had Life, is look'd upon with Abhorrence, and never known
in this World: But I am satisfied you will easily accommodate
your self to our Diet, since the Taste of our Fruits is much more
exquisite than yours, since they fully satisfy, and never cloy:"

Which I found true by Experience, and I was so far from hankering after
Flesh, that even the Thoughts of it were shocking and nauseous to me.

We drank the most delicious Wine, which they press'd from the Grape
into their Cups, and which was no way intoxicating. After Supper, the
_Selenite_ address'd himself to me in Words to this Effect.

"I have acquainted my Friends here present, who are come to pass some
Days with me, both with the Contents of the _Cacklogallinian_
Emperor's Letter, and the Reasons which mov'd this Prince to desire
an Intercourse between the two Worlds, and we will all of us wait on
you to our Prince's Court, tho' strictly speaking, we neither have,
nor need a Governour; and we pay the distant Respect due to your
Princes to the eldest among us, as he is the nearest to eternal
Happiness. But that I may give you some Idea, both of this World,
and its Inhabitants, you must learn, that Men in yours are endued
with a Soul and an Understanding; the Soul is a material Substance,
and cloathes the Understanding, as the Body does the Soul; at the
Separation of these two, the Body is again resolved into Earth, and
the Soul of the Virtuous is placed in this Planet, till the
Understanding being freed from it by a Separation we may call Death,
tho' not attended with Fear or Agony, it is resolved into our Earth,
and its Principle of Life, the Understanding, returns to the Great
Creator; for till we have here purg'd off what of Humanity remains
attach'd to the Soul, we can never hope to appear before the pure
Eyes of the Deity.

"We are here, _said he_, in a State of Ease and Happiness, tho' no
way comparable to that we expect at our Dissolution, which we as
earnestly long for, as you Mortals carefully avoid it. We forget
nothing that pass'd while we were cloath'd in Flesh, and Inhabitants
of your Globe, and have no other Uneasiness, than what the
Reflection of our Ingratitude to the Eternal Goodness, while in
Life, creates in us, which the Eternal lessens in proportion to our
Repentance, which is here very sincere. This will cease your Wonder
at hearing the Sublunary Languages.

"We have here no Passions to gratify, no Wants to supply, the Roots
of Vice, which under no Denomination is known among us; consequently
no Laws, nor Governours to execute them, are here necessary.

"Had the _Cacklogallinian_ Prince known thus much, he would have been
sensible how vain were his Expectations of getting from us the Gold
he thirsts after: For were we to meet with the purest Veins of that
Metal, by removing only one Turf, not a _Selenite_ would think it
worth his while.

"This is a Place of Peace and Tranquillity, and this World is exactly
adapted to the Temper of its Inhabitants: Nature here is in an
Eternal Calm; we enjoy an everlasting Spring; the Soil yields
nothing noxious, and we can never want the Necessaries of Life,
since every Herb affords a salubrious Repast to the _Selenites_.

"We pass our Days without Labour, without other Anxiety, than what I
mention'd, and the longing Desire we have for our Dissolution, makes
every coming Day encrease our Happiness.

"We have not here, as in your World, Distinction of Sexes; for know,
all Souls are masculine (if I may be allow'd that Term, after what
I've said) however distinguish'd in the Body; and tho' of late Years
the Number of those which change your World for this (especially of
the _European_ Quarter) is very small; yet we do not apprehend our
World will be left unpeopled."

"You say, _replied I_, that none but the virtuous Soul reaches these
blissfull Seats; what then becomes of the Vicious? and how comes it,
that the Soul, when loosed by Sleep, I suppose without Distinction,
retires hither?"

"The Decrees, _said he_, of the Almighty are inscrutable, and you
ask me Questions are not in my Power to resolve you."

"Have not, _said I_, the _Cacklogallinians_ Souls, think you, since
they're endued with Reason?" "If they have, _said he_, they never
are sent hither."

I repeated this Discourse to the _Cacklogallinians_, which made
_Volatilio_ extreamly melancholly.

Happy Men! _said he,_ to whose Species the divine Goodness has been
so indulgent! Miserable _Cacklogallinians_! if destin'd, after
bearing the Ills of Life, to Annihilation. Let us, _Probusomo_,
never think of returning, but beg we may be allow'd to end our Days
with these Favourites of Heaven.

I interpreted this to the _Selenite_, who shook his Head, and said it
was, he believ'd, impossible. That he did not doubt but Providence would
reward the Virtuous of his Species; that his Mercy and Justice were
without Bound, which ought to keep him from desponding.

The next Day a great Number of _Selenites_ came to see me, and
entertain'd me with abundance of Candour. I seeing no Difference in
Dress, nor any Deference paid to any, as distinguish'd by a superior
Rank, I took Liberty to ask my _English Selenite_, if all the
Inhabitants were upon a Level, and if they had no Servants nor
Artificers?

"We have, _said he_, no Distinctions among us; who in your World
begg'd Alms, with us, has the same Respect as he who govern'd a
Province: Tho', to say Truth, we have but few of your sublunary
Quality among us. We have no Occasion for Servants; we are all
Artificers, and none where Help is necessary, but offers his with
Alacrity. For Example, would I build a House, every one here, and
as many more as were wanting, would take a Pleasure to assist me."

He told me, that the next Day they intended to present me to _Abrahijo_,
the oldest _Selenite_.

Accordingly, we set out at Sun-rising, and entered a Bark about a League
from the House, and having pass'd about four Leagues on a River which
ran thro' a Valley beautiful beyond Description, we went ashore within
an Hundred Yards _Abrahijo_'s Place of Abode.

When we came in, the venerable old Man, whose compos'd and chearful
Countenance spoke the Heaven of his Mind, rose from his Chair, and came
to meet us; he was of a great Age, but free from the Infirmities which
attend it in our World.

The _English Selenite_ presented me to him with few Words, and he
received me with Tenderness.

After he was inform'd of my Story, he spoke to me by our Interpreter,
to this Effect.

"My Son, I hope you will reap a solid Advantage from the perilous
Journey you have made, tho' your Expectation of finding Riches among
us is frustrated. All that I have to give you, is my Advice to
return to your World, place your Happiness in nothing transitory;
nor imagine that any Riches, but those which are Eternal, which
neither _Thief can carry away, nor Rust corrupt_, are worthy of your
Pursuit. Keep continually in your Eye the Joys prepared for those
who employ the Talents they are entrusted with, as they ought:
Reflect upon the little Content your World can afford you: Consider
how short is Life, and that you have but little Time to spare for
Trifles, when the grand Business, the securing your eternal Rest,
ought to employ your Mind. You are there in a State of Probation,
and you must there chuse whether you will be happy or miserable; you
will not be put to a second Trial; you sign at once your own
Sentence, and it will stand irrevocable, either for or against you.
Weigh well the Difference between a momentary and imperfect, and an
eternal and solid Happiness, to which the Divine Goodness invites
you; nay, by that Calmness, that Peace of Mind, which attends a
virtuous Life, bribes you to make Choice of, if you desire to be
among us, be your own Friend, and you will be sure to have those
Desires gratify'd. But you must now return, since it was never
known, that gross Flesh and Blood ever before breath'd this Air, and
that your Stay may be fatal to you, and disturb the Tranquillity of
the _Selenites_. This I prophesy, and my Compassion obliges me to
warn you of it."

I made him a profound Reverence, thank'd him for his charitable
Admonition, and told him I hoped nothing should win me from the
Performance of a Duty which carry'd with it such ineffable Rewards.
That if no greater were promised, than those indulged to the
_Selenites_, I would refuse no Misery attending the most abject Life,
to be enrolled in the Number of the Inhabitants of that happy Region.

"I wish, _replied he_, the false Glare of the World does not hinder
the Execution of these just Resolutions: But that I may give you
what Assistance is in our Power, in hopes of having you among us, we
will shew the World unmask'd; that is, we will detain some time the
Souls of Sleepers, that you may see what Man is, how false, how
vain, in all he acts or wishes. Know, that the Soul loos'd by Sleep,
has the Power to call about it all the Images which it would employ,
can raise imaginary Structures, form Seas, Lands, Fowls, Beasts, or
whatever the rational Faculty is intent upon. You shall now take
some Refreshment, and after that we will both divert and instruct
you."

The Table was spread by himself and the other _Selenites_, the
_Cacklogallinians_ and my self invited, and I observ'd it differ'd
nothing, either in Quality or Quantity, from that of my _English_
Host.

After a solemn Adoration of the ineffable Creator, each took his Place;
having finish'd our Meal, at which a strict Silence was observed,
_Abrahijo_ took me by the Hand, and led me into a neighbouring Field,
the Beauty of which far excell'd that of the most labour'd and
artificial Garden among us.

"Here, _said he_, observe yon Shade; I shall not detain it, that you
may see the Care and Uneasiness attending Riches."

The Shade represented an old withered starv'd Carcass, brooding over
Chests of Money. Immediately appeared three ill-look'd Fellows; Want,
Despair, and Murder, were lively-pictur'd in their Faces; they were
taking out the Iron Bars of the old Man's Window, when all vanish'd of a
sudden. I ask'd the Meaning of it; he told me, the Terror the Dream of
Thieves put him into, had awaken'd him; and the Minute he slept again, I
should see again his Shade. Hardly had _Abrahijo_ done speaking, when I
again saw the old Man, with a young well-dress'd Spark standing by him,
who paid him great Respect. I heard him say very distinctly,

"Sir, do you think I am made of Money, or can you imagine the
Treasure of a Nation will supply your Extravagance? The Value I have
for you on Account of your Father, who was my good Friend, has made
me tire all my Acquaintance, by borrowing of them to furnish your
Pockets: However, I'll try, if I cannot borrow One Thousand more for
you, tho' I wish your Estate will bear it, and that I don't out of
my Love to you, rashly bring myself into Trouble. You know I am
engaged for all; and if the Mortgage you have given should not be
valid, I am an undone Man. I can't, I protest, raise this Money
under Fifteen _per Cent_, and it's cheap, very cheap, considering
how scarce a Commodity it is grown. It's a Pity so generous a young
Gentleman should be straiten'd. I don't question a Pair of Gloves
for the Trouble I have. I know you too well to insist on't: I am old
and crazy, Coach-hire is very dear, I can't walk, God help me, and
my Circumstances won't afford a Coach. A Couple of Guineas is a
Trifle with you: I'll get you the Thousand Pound, if I can, at
Fifteen _per Cent._ but if my Friend should insist on Twenty (for
Money is very hard to be got with the best Security) must I refuse
it? Yes; I can't suffer you to pay such an exorbitant Premium; it is
too much, too much in Conscience; I can't advise you to it."

The young Gentleman answer'd, he was sensible of his Friendship, and
left all to him.

"Well, well, _said the Miser_, come again two Hours hence, I'll see
what's to be done."

He went away, t'other barr'd the Door after him, and falls to rummaging
his Bags, and telling out the Sum to be lent to the young Gentleman:
When, on a sudden, his Doors flew open, and a Couple of Rogues bound him
in his Bed, and went off laden with Baggs. Soon after, a meagre Servant
comes in, and unbinds him; he tears his Hair, raves, stamps, and has all
the Gestures of a Madman; he sends the Servant out, takes a Halter,
throws it over a Beam, and going to hang himself, vanishes.

Soon after, he appeared again with Officers, who hurry the young
Gentleman to Goal. He follows him, gets his Estate made over to him, and
then sets his Prisoner at Liberty: The Scene of the Goal vanishes, and
he's in a noble Mansion-Seat with the young Gentleman in Rags, who gives
him Possession, and receives a Trifle from him for that Consideration.
He turns away all the Servants, and in a Palace he is alone roasting an
Egg over a Handful of Fire for his Dinner. His Son comes in, as he is by
himself, goes to murder him, and he vanishes again. He returns to our
Sight, digging in his Garden, and hiding Money, for Soldiers appear in
the neighbouring Village: He has scarce buried it, when they rifle his
House; this makes us lose him again for a little Space. His Coachman
comes to him, tells him his Son is kill'd; he answers,

"No matter, he was a great Expence, I shall save at least Forty
Pounds a Year by his Death, it's a good Legacy, _Tom_."

He tells him a Lord offer'd him Five Hundred Pounds to carry off his
young Lady, but that he refused it, and thought himself obliged to
acquaint him with his Lordship's Design.

"You are a Fool, _replies the old Man_; take the Money, I'll consent,
we'll snack it--Quit of another. My Lord shan't have a Groat with
her. What a Charge are Children! This Lord is the best Friend I have,
to take her off my Hands. To be sure bring the Money, carry her to
my Lord, and bring the Money; go take Time by the Fore-lock, he may
recant, then so much Money's lost. Go, run to my Lord, tell him
you'll do it."

Here he thrust the Fellow out, and appear'd with a smiling Countenance.
A Man comes in, and tells him the Exchequer is shut up, Stocks are
fallen, a War declar'd, and a new Tax laid on Land; he beats his Breast,
groans aloud, and vanishes.

"By this Wretch, _said Abrahijo_, you see the Care and Anxiety wait
on the Miserable. The Love of Gold in him has extinguish'd Nature;
nay, it predominates over Self-love; for he hastens his End, by not
allowing his Body either Rest, or sufficient Nourishment, only that
he may encrease the Number of his Coffers."

Another Shade appear'd with a great Crowd of People, huzzaing, a
_Venditor_, a _Venditor_; he goes before them, steps into every Shop,
enquires after the Health of each Family, kisses the Wives, and out of
his thrusts Gold into their Mouths. Here he bows to a Tinker, there
embraces a Cobler, shakes a Scavinger by the Hand, stands bare-headed,
and compliments an Ale-Wife, invites a Score of Shoemakers, Taylors,
Pedlars, Weavers, and Hostlers, to do him the Honour of their Company
to Dinner.

The Scene changes; he's at Court, the Ministers repay him his servile
Cringes by theirs; one comes up to him, and says, he hopes, when the
Bill comes into the House, he will favour him with his Vote for its
passing: He answers, he shall discharge the Trust reposed in him, like a
Man of Honour, in forwarding what is for the Good of his Country, and
opposing the contrary, tho' the Consequence were his own Ruin: That he
begg'd his Lordship's Pardon, if he dissented from him in Opinion, and
did not think what he required warrantable in a Man of Honour.

"You are not well inform'd, _replied the Nobleman_, but we'll talk of
that another Day, when I hope I shall convince you, that you did not
well understand me; my present Business is to wish you Joy,
_Courvite_'s Regiment is vacant, and tho' you have never serv'd,
your personal Bravery and good Conduct in the Senate have spoke so
much in your behalf, that you will to morrow have the Commission
sent you."

"My Lord, _replied the Patriot_, this is an unexpected favour, and I
am satisfied I owe it to your Lordship's Goodness. I hope an
Opportunity to speak my Gratitude, will present it self; in the mean
while count upon me, in whatever I can serve your Interest."

At these Words, with a visible Joy in his Looks, he vanish'd.

Three dirty Mechanicks appeared in a Shoemaker's Shop, who was a
Dreamer. He was declaiming to his Companions over a Pot of Beer, after
the following Manner.

"Look ye, Neighbours, there's an old Proverb says, _It is not the
Hood which makes the Monk_; the being born a Gentleman does not make
a Man of Sense; and the being bred a Tradesman, does not deprive us
of it; for how many great Men have leap'd from the Shop-board,
sprung up from the Stall, and have, by patching and heel-piecing
Religion and the State, made their Names famous to After-Ages? I can
name many, but I shall mention only _John_ of _Leyden_. Now, I see
no Reason, why Meanness of Birth should be an Obstacle to Merit, and
I am resolved, as I find a great many Things which ought to be
redress'd both in Church and State, if you my Friends will stand by
me, to aim at the setting both upright: For you must own, they are
basely trod awry. Trade is dead, Money is scarce, the Parsons are
proud, rich and lazy; War is necessary for the Circulation of Money;
and an honest Man may starve in these Times of Peace and Beggary.

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